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Sir Lags-a-lot (aliases: Lags, Lagsy, the Sir) is your typical HP laptop by day, and an international criminal by night. He started off as your everyday drug-trafficing, gun-toting, gangster laptop, but after two successful brain transplants into newer, stronger bodies, Sir Lags-a-lot became the world terror he is today.

The Sir is owned by Shannon. His favorite pastime is stabbing or raping Evan O'Connor. He regularly employs two mercenary Nintendo DSes, and his arch-nemesis is Keytar.

Extra: he has a faded tattoo of a Murkrow (pokemon).